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Mask Off for Masc with Vance
A podcast where Vance, an intimacy coach, talks openly and candidly with other queer men about the issues we face. These in depth and personal conversations are meant to shed a light on our own individual stories of struggle, vulnerability, and authenticity.
Episodes
22 episodes
Brian - Belonging, Grief, and Queer Ritual
In this episode, Vance chats with Brian G. Murphy, author of Love Beyond Monogamy, for a conversation about ritual, community, and the ways we create meaning in our lives. Together, they explore how experiences like yoga, music, and ga...
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Episode 21
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1:08:12
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Tom - Monogamous, Open, or Something Else?
In this episode, Vance chats with Tom, a sex and relationship therapist, for an honest conversation about what it feels like to be gay men navigating modern intimacy. Together, they unpack loneliness, emotional safety, and the tension between f...
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Episode 20
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1:06:45
Gary - Compulsive Sex, Safety & the Search for Real Intimacy
In this episode, Vance chats with Gary Albert — therapist, embodiment facilitator, and former classical musician — to explore the winding path that led him into supporting gay men in their relationships with pleasure, intimacy, and sexuality. W...
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Episode 19
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1:08:37
Dr Dallas - Sober Sex Is Real
In this episode, Vance chats with Dr. Dallas Bragg, a recovery coach who supports queer men navigating chemsex and addiction. Dallas opens up about his own journey from addiction to recovery, the challenges of relationships in the midst of it, ...
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Episode 18
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1:02:31
Daniel - Getting Off or Getting Real?
Vance and Daniel dive into the complexities of the adult industry—exploring perceptions, personal journeys, and the importance of intimacy and connection in porn. They unpack the realities of production, the impact of societal norms on identity...
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Episode 17
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1:14:18
David aka Davey Wavey - Love, Lust, and Age Gaps
Vance sits down with David Jacques, aka Davey Wavey, for a no-holds-barred conversation about dating, hookups, and desire. They swap some of their best (and worst) dating stories and talk about how finding love and casual connections in the dig...
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Episode 16
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52:11
Kevin - Authenticity, Mindfulness, and Sexual Empowerment
In this episode, Coach Kevin Martin and Vance dive into personal growth, the intersection of therapy and content creation, and the journey of embracing sexuality. We talk about the challenges of staying authentic online, the importance of mindf...
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Episode 15
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1:01:41
Tim - Sex Education and the Freedom to Be Ourselves
In this engaging conversation, Tim Lagman, a certified sex educator and podcaster, shares insights on sex education, body image, and the complexities of relationships within the LGBTQ+ community. The discussion covers personal experiences, the ...
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Episode 14
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49:43
Nathan - Learning to Love Like Men Who Feel
In this conversation, Vance and Nathan Serrato discuss the intricacies of queer love coaching, the impact of gay masculinity on relationships, and the importance of vulnerability and emotional intelligence. They explore childhood experiences th...
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Episode 13
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57:44
Romance is a Kink (Bonus Episode)
To close out the summer, I wanted to bring you something lighter—especially after the last episode on grief. I’ve always been a romantic at heart. I want to fall madly in love, but as I grow older and wiser, I’ve learned not to lose myself in i...
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Episode 12
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14:25
Grief (Bonus Episode)
This bonus episode is a vulnerable one. I wanted to talk about grief—how it’s shaped me, how it lingers, and how I still struggle to face it. I’ve also realized how much I struggle with intimacy, especially when it comes to letting people see t...
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Episode 11
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17:56
Stefan - Madonna, Activism, and the Art of Being Unapologetic
It’s the Madonna episode! Anyone who knows me knows how deep my obsession with Madonna runs. But it’s not a superficial fascination—it’s rooted in what she’s represented for me and so many others. In this episode, I’m joined by my guest Stefan,...
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Episode 10
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53:24
Jason - What is Intimacy, Really?
In this week’s episode, I chat with Tantra facilitator and sexological bodyworker Jason King. We explore the question: What is intimacy?—especially in the context of sexual connection. Our conversation dives into vulnerability, and how...
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Episode 9
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59:17
Firefly - The Truth About Gay Sex, Shame, and Connection
In this episode, I chat with Firefly Tantra, who works with men using the practice of Tantra. He breaks down what sessions with clients actually look like, how Tantra compares to somatic sex coaching, and where the two overlap. We talk about de...
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Episode 8
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57:41
Matthew - Erotic Performance as a Path to Connection
In this episode, I have the pleasure of chatting with the funny and delightful Matthew Shur. We talk about our experiences working with Himeros and how each of us found our way into the world of porn. We also explore how performance can enhance...
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Episode 7
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1:02:36
Rahim - How to Care Without Losing Your Mind
I had a truly meaningful conversation with my friend Rahim Thawer that I’m excited to share. We explored a wide range of topics, all rooted in the theme of empathy. How do we connect with people we disagree with? What does activism look like in...
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Episode 6
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1:00:54
Priscilla Mossy Stone - From Conversion Therapy to Freedom
My friend Priscilla Mossy Stone joins me to chat about their story of coming out, going to conversion therapy, and finding their way to drag. We discuss how social norms of masculinity and femininity can keep men in a small box of rules to live...
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Episode 5
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1:08:39
Jean-Francois - Bodies, Shame, and The Art of Feeling Good
I met my friend Jean-Francois a few years ago when we were both fairly new yoga teachers. We reconnected after our yoga paths both crossed into the world of eroticism. We chat about how those tools that we found in a spiritual and physical prac...
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Episode 4
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1:02:17
Don - Kindness in Uncertain Times
In this episode I am joined by my friend Don Shine, who is a coach/body worker and retreat facilitator for the Body Electric school. At the time of recording this episode it was the week of the American inauguration for Donald Trump. We discuss...
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Episode 3
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57:20
Michael - Dancing, Drugs, and Downward Dog
In this episode I am joined by my friend Michael DeCorte. We both share our experiences of struggling with addiction and how it’s changed over the years. Michael had recently turned 50 when we recorded this episode and we chat about how it feel...
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Episode 2
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1:00:32
Alkarim - Intimacy, Connection, and Shooting Porn
In this episode I am joined by my friend and collaborator, Karim. We discuss how certain social settings are not for us, and how we tend to like deeper and more meaningful conversations. This leads us to how we enjoy getting to know people on t...
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Episode 1
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48:55